When you dream about your perfect partner, what do they look like? I’ll bet they’re very attractive – exactly your physical type, right?

Physical chemistry is important – who are we kidding – but what happens when your dream relationship runs into real-life problems?

Well, physical chemistry alone won’t save you. But this essential relationship quality will:

Relationship Self-Awareness

What is it?:

• An ability to rise above the day to day issues (job, health, family, stress, etc.) and see the relationship as a whole.
• An ability to discuss the overall state of your relationship, without getting dragged down into minute details and petty grievances.
• An openness to seeing things from your partner’s perspective & being open to change & compromise for the sake of your relationship.
• An ability to say you’re wrong.

How can you spot it?:

• Is someone open to new ideas, or are they close-minded in your early conversations?
• When discussing past relationships, do they blame their past partners or do they accept some of the blame themselves? Do they say they’ve learned from past relationships?
• Do they anger easily & yell at restaurant staff, other drivers, etc.; do they constantly criticize others but never their own actions?
• Do they value relationships with friends, family, co-workers, etc?

Does your dating life feel like a 2nd job? If you answered ‘yes’ – or even ‘sometimes’ – you’re on the wrong track.

To find your someone special, you need to make a lasting impression when you first meet them. But how? Well, its not what you say – its what you ask.

Here’s 5 questions that’ll help you turn a first date into a true connection.

1. How did you meet your best friend, and whats the best thing about them?:  this question allows someone to open up about themselves, without actually talking about themselves. Typically, we mirror what we admire – so they’ll likely share a similar quality.
2. What’s your favorite place in the world, and why?:  asking someone this will almost certainly put a smile on their face – on a first date, that’s a great start. It’ll also transport them away to a place that makes them happy; then they’ll tell you why it makes them happy. Any questions?
3. What’s the one country you’ve always wanted to visit, and why do you want to go there?:  staying on the travel theme – but instead of a place they know and love, a place they’ve always wanted to go to. Aside from keeping the positive vibe going, it can also be revealing – if they’re dying to do a two month African safari, and you’ve never traveled off the beaten path, this might be a topic worth exploring.
4. What’s the most fun job you’ve ever had?:  talking too much about work is generally not advisable on a first date – but this question allows you to learn about what makes someone tick, while also keeping it light. As with all these questions – be ready to answer the same question about yourself too!
5. Without telling me what it is, why is your favorite movie your favorite?:  this question puts a twist on a tried-and-true, and uninspired, first date question. It also turns it into something of a game as they try and answer. Your date may forget what you say, but they’ll never forget how you made them feel.

Executive Search Dating is featured on DatingAdvice.com today, see a link to the article below!

“When you’re on the road to a relationship, Executive Search Dating offers a shortcut by arranging quality dates, providing helpful feedback, and doing all the work required to help you achieve that goal.”

Link to full article:
https://www.datingadvice.com/for-men/executive-search-dating-vancouver-headhunters-seek-the-right-person-for-you

So, you arrive at your date all ready to make a great impression and what happens next? Your date turns out to be a dud. Worse yet, an obnoxious dud.

How did this happen? What did you do to deserve this? And, most importantly, what are you supposed to do now?

Well the answer isn’t obvious – but its easy, and will ensure this experience doesn’t derail your love life (or even your evening). Here’s the mistake, and the 3-step technique you should use instead:

The Wrong Approach:

The biggest mistake you can make is letting your dates obnoxious behavior get the better of you – by taking it personally, getting angry, or worse yet getting into a shouting match with them in public. This might feel right at the moment, but will only make things worse.

The Right Approach:

Step #1:  Take a deep breath. Resist the urge to get into an argument, or to respond immediately to something your date does or says.

Step #2:  Give them a second (maybe even a third) chance.  Unless they’ve done or said something overtly offensive, give them another chance to make amends. Maybe they were just nervous or had a bad day and let that get the better of them. Be patient and understanding – even try and laugh it off – and see if the pattern changes or improves. Try and get the date conversation turned in a more positive direction.

Step #3:  If you’ve completed steps #1 and #2, and your date continues to be obnoxious, it’s time to exit stage left. No need to make a scene or hurt anybody’s feelings. After some simple small talk, apologize but tell them you need to go as you’re meeting some friends a bit later. Thank them, wish them a great night and leave. Don’t waste anymore time thinking about it – you’ve got better dates ahead.

You want a relationship that lasts, but how can you know? No matter how strong your feelings are at the start, the future is always uncertain – how will your relationship withstand the test of time & unknown challenges that come your way?

Because there are clues. Early signs that your relationship will survive, and maybe even strengthen in the future, no matter what comes your way.

Here’s 7 signs your relationship will last:

1. Trust is a must: trust is the cornerstone of any healthy partnership. With it, your relationship can thrive and withstand even the biggest challenges. Without it, you’ll be ill-equipped to take on the really tough stuff.
2. Shared life goals: if you and your partner have similar goals that would take you to similar places, that is a big factor in determining if you’re in it for the long haul. This is a good reminder than you should be having frequent chats about what you want out of the relationship, and life, in regards to kids, marriage, jobs, and location.
3. Physical intimacy: being unhappy with your sex life can be a strain on your relationship and could even cause a split. But physical intimacy comes in many forms, all of which are important. Whether it’s a kiss hello or goodbye, snuggling on the couch, or holding hands. Even non-sexual touching builds connection between partners.
4. Communication really matters: couples who are able to effectively communicate are able to better understand one another and experience greater intimacy.  It’s important to have fun together, but if you can’t discuss really important matters together, the fun times may not last for the long term.
5. Laughter is the best medicine: relationships (and life) aren’t always easy, but having lots of good and light times together can make the bad times a little easier. Consider laughter a booster shot against future adversity.
6. Being wrong is right: healthy couples are willing to sacrifice their pride if it means ending an argument or letting their partner know that they are sorry – if you and your partner seem to do this equally, and move on quickly, your relationship is built to last.
7. Support through tough times: if you trust your partner to support you during times of great distress (illness, money issues, family issues, etc.), it not only helps you get through it, but it also builds a lasting bond for the future – a virtuous cycle of relationship success.

Are you feeling blue about the end of summer? Well, that’s natural – but if you’re ready for a relationship, here’s the good news: Professional Matchmakers may consider summer the “dating season”, but they consider fall the “relationship season”.

Why you ask? Well actually there’s 7 reasons, and here they are:

1. The numbers game:  it seems like everyone’s away in July and August, but that all changes in September. Practice your best ‘what I did for summer’ stories and introduce yourself to some new people.

2. The ‘Relationship Season’:  spring and summer may be peak ‘dating’ season, but Matchmakers consider fall the ‘relationship season’. Try focussing less on ‘first dates’, and more on 2nd and 3rd dates with someone interesting you’ve met over the summer – fall dating is all about ‘quality over quantity’.

3. The color of love:  ask any Vancouverite and they’ll tell you – September is the most beautiful month of the year. Use this to your advantage and take your date for a romantic stroll through the UBC endowment lands or Stanley Park. Watch your love life blossom amongst the falling leaves.

4. Indoor patio season:  picnic and barbeque season may be behind us, but the indoor patio season has just begun. Try an evening cocktail on the spectacular heated patios at Sandbar in Granville Island or The Cactus Club English Bay.

5. A sporting chance:  you may not be a hard core sports fan (ladies this means you), but many Vancouver single men are. Try your soon-to-be-favourite sports lounge on a game day or night, and stick around after the game to mingle with some new people. Sports knowledge not required.

6. Cuddling weather:  as the temperatures get cooler, what better reason to spend some quality time with your special someone in front of a fireplace near you. If you don’t have a fireplace handy, ‘Netflix and chill’ will also work – note: blanket highly recommended.

7. Bumper Crop:  put your culinary skills to full use – visit a local farmers market together and pick up some local ingredients. Then make a hearty & healthy meal complete with a wine of your choosing. If you’re cooking skills aren’t yet up to par, download a few recipes and turn your dinner into a do-it-yourself cooking event.